BILL GATES COMES BOTTOM OF THE FORBES POOR LIST FOR THE 16^TH TIME

Microsoft founder and modern-day Croesus, Bill Gates, came bottom in Forbes magazine’s twentieth annual Poor List, making him the least poor man in the world for the 16^th time. The little known of but ever ubiquitous “Unnamed homeless woman in the developing world” topped the Forbes Poor List for the 20^th time in a row.

Gates was said to be delighted with his title as the world’s least poor man. The software sovereign beat off stiff competition from Mexican businessman and purveyor of hilarious names, Carlos Silm, and Spanish fashion magnate and part-time Gerald Ford impersonator, Amancio Ortega – both of whom have seen huge decreases to their poorness over the last twelve months.

Critics are using the list to highlight the ever increasing chasm of income disparity across the world.

“Soon, the least poor 1% will be less poor than the rest of the poorest 99% put together…” said Oxfam spokesman, Harriet Brown-Charriet, “I’m fairly sure that is the best way to present that fact.”

Gates however, has answered back at critics, citing the Gates Foundation as evidence of his philanthropic intent.

“My foundation is meant to bring hope and joy for everyone,” said Gates at a recent conference, “Except people using I-Macs. They can fuck off.”

Gates' exorbitant wealth paid for the only invisible bass guitar in the world.