Thursday, 24 January 2013


Prime Minister David Cameron promised that if re-elected in 2015, he would hold a referendum on whether Britain should remain in the EU, or leave…and potentially join Africa.

The Prime Minister’s statement stressed the importance of giving the Britons the freedom to choose between the red-tape-lined, supra-legal, mandatory-square banana regulations-fest that was the European Union; and the sun-baked, Attenborough-loved, mineral-filled-but-occasionally-troublesome continent of Africa.

“The British public have the right to choose, this has always been a Tory priority,” thundered the Prime Minister, “Belgium or Burkina Faso? Oberpfaffenhofen or Ouagadougou? The choice is yours!”

The Prime Minister’s latest statement is said to be a move which will appease – and for a time, silence - Euro-sceptic members of his party, as well regaining some of the ground lost to UKIP in recent months. However, despite pleasing many Tory Euro-sceptics, Cameron’s pledge has alienated a large number of Tory Ethnic-racists.

“I never imagined there could be anything worse than being ruled by a horde of krauts and frogs,” said one particularly racist party member, “then they suggested this.”

Many commentators are predicting that disaffected Tories begin defecting to far-right parties in their droves. Organisations such as the BNP, the EDL, the Mighty White Alliance and the Project for the Eternal Celebration of Enoch Powell, are all possible beneficiaries. Others are suggesting that this splinter group may form a party all of their own, solely for the representation of conservative racist interests.   

Europe or Africa?

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