OLYMPIC NEWS IN BRIEF:

Jessica Ennis crowned World’s biggest home-wrecker - 2.3 million infatuated men and women leave their wives and husbands on Sunday morning.

Public Sector workers furious at the use of volunteers at London 2012 – the sight of thousands of people working happily for the benefit of the people and expecting nothing in return is said to be indirectly defamatory.

World Records tumble at the Greenwich Arena – the record for the largest number of paedophiles in a room is broken five times during the Women’s gymnastics.

Public-sector enemy number one.....